Girls, would it be neat if, while in bed with a girl, I started narrating like we were animals on the BBC?

"The male attacks the female from the rear and thrusts in a display of both dominance and territorial right. You'll notice the male is very eager to engage with the somewhat timid female. And he's in. The female will remain in a submissive position until the male has completed his task. This could take anywhere from 2 to 20 minutes. On this day the male is done relatively quickly and he dismounts while the female scurries off to the lavatory for a smoke and a pancake."